Step 10 : Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
We have many sayings in A.A.
One goes states ..
All of the steps are important. Work them in order. They were numbered for a reason.
Of course this is basically true. At the same time, they are not meant to paralyze you with delays and indecision. Get on with them. Steps 1 through 7 can be done in literally a matter of several hours.
Does this fact that the first seven steps can be done in a matter of a few hours shock you?
Consider the fact that, according to our written history in World Service Conference approved literature, the following facts are indisputable.
Doctor Bob made his Amends ON the same day that he took his last drink. There was no Big Book, there were no steps. He just went out and promptly made his amends.
Do I personally recommend doing this? No! I certainly do not. But don't spend the rest of your life stuck on Step 9 either.
The most important thing to the early members was their quiet time (read prayer and meditation) in the morning. It's a wonder Step 11 was not put in as Step 2.
Why are we trying to stop people from immediately getting the benefits of Step 11 by saying they must work the steps in order, 1 through 12?
Newcomers with literally hours or WOW, even a few days dry, were helping other newcomers still in the hospital. So much for all of our 'unwritten requirements' for people to sponsor (you must have so many days / weeks / months / even years to sponsor).
For me, Step 10 is extremely important.
Step 10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
I will repeat the above. For the rest of our lives we are to continue to take personal inventory and to make amends when we are wrong or have harmed someone else.
What this amazing Step 10 does is this :
Because you will continue to take personal inventory for the rest of your life, you can get through your Step 4 inventory quickly. I was given one hour to write down the things I was going to take-to-my-grave with me.
Whatever you will miss (and yes, you will miss a lot of things) on your first pass through your 4th Step, you will find later doing Step 10 work.
The same for Step 9. Making amends is a life-long, ongoing process for us IF we want to follow our Design For Living given us in the 12 Steps. So when you come to Steps 8 and 9, get-on-with-them quickly and continue the process the rest of your life.
My Sponsor of now over 30-years, Jim C, in the San Francisco Bay Area gave to me the following gift.
THE WRITTEN 10th STEP ..
A WRITTEN TENTH (10th) STEP .. as taught me by Jim ‘C’ in
In the last full paragraph at the bottom
of page 84 of the ‘Big Book’ .. we are
told .. “This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness,
dishonesty, resentment and fear. When
these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and
make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone.”
Below is a WRITTEN TENTH (10th) STEP .
This is to be done in hand using pen / pencil and paper NOT on a computer!
Write down the Third Step Prayer (page 63
of the ‘A.A. Big Book’). “God, I offer
myself to thee – to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of
the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties,
that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy
Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!”
Now write:
‘I have resentments.’
List what you are feeling: ‘I resent
________’. Continue listing resentments
until you cease to actively feel them. Do NOT stop to ponder them !
Now write: ‘I have fears.’
List your fears: ‘I fear (I am afraid of)
_________’ . Continue listing your fears until you cease to actively feel
them. Do NOT sit and ponder them!
Now you are going to do a second cycle. This
second look at your resentments and fears is why you do NOT sit and ponder what
you are going to write in the first cycle above.
Again write: ‘I resent ________’. Continue
listing resentments until you cease to actively feel them. IF you have no
resentments on this second cycle just write: “I have no more resentments.”
Again write: ‘I fear (I am afraid of)
_________’ . Continue listing fears until you cease to actively feel them. IF
you have no fears this second time through just write .. “I have no more
fears.”
Write: “God, I am now willing to have you
remove these resentments and these fears.”
Write: “God, please remove these
resentments and these fears.”
Write the Seventh Step Prayer (page 76 of
the ‘A.A. Big Book’). “My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of
me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of
character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant
me strength as I go out from here, to do your bidding. Amen.”
Write the Eleventh Step Prayer (page 88 of ‘The A.A. Big Book: “Thy will be
done.”
Write: “Thank you God” .. “I love you God”
..
/s/
sign you name and date your Tenth Step ..
THEN READ YOUR ENTIRE TENTH STEP TO ANOTHER HUMAN BEING.
You have just worked eight of the twelve
steps !
Step 3 .. you wrote the Third Step Prayer.
Step 4 .. you wrote a short inventory on
resentments and fears.
Step 6 .. you became ready to have God to
remove your defects of character.
Step 7 .. you humbly asked God to please
remove them AND you wrote the Seventh Step Prayer !
Step 11 .. you wrote the Eleventh Step
Prayer.
Step 5 .. you shared it with another human
being.
Step 10 .. is the above process.
Step 12 .. you have worked with another.
IF NECESSARY .. do an 8th and a
9th step .. in concert with the 10th step above.
Often when I do the above written Tenth Step I also will write about anger I am feeling. I also will write about Gratitude that I am feeling.
I often suggest to newcomers that they do the above process for ten consecutive days.
I have watched lives change before my very eyes.
There you have it. My thoughts on Step 10.